A peep into Ojukwu’s love life

Ojukwu with Elizabeth (left); with Bianca right.

By LINUS OBOGO

HE had a tough and oracular mien. The more you tried to understand him, the more difficult and complex he seemed. Not many, especially the men folk, could decode him easily. But beneath those deportments were his charm, élan, oratory.

While his fellow men found him a bit impenetrable, the ladies seemed to know his genetic code and could conveniently decode or deconstruct him. He was

such a dashing young man with an aura that was simply irresistible. Little wonder he cut a dash among charming and beautiful women.

Those were the portraits of the enigma called Dim Chukwu Odimegwu Ojukwu, the late Biafran warlord, the People’s General, The Lion of the Tribe of Biafra, the Generals’ General, Ezeigbo Gburugburu, as he was known in his commune.

Ojukwu was not one you could derisively label a lecher, yet he was a lady’s man: affectionate, romantic and pampering He was believed to be a connoisseur of beautiful women. Women, it was claimed, inspired his thought but never rule his life.

Questions were often posed by women as to why Ojukwu was so adored by not just women but beautiful women. But the posers were barely answered before they found themselves dotting around or hankering after him. No woman could wave aside his charisma, elegance and seductive poise.

The late Biafran hero embodied all that a woman craved for and much else. A patrician pedigree and upbringing, an Oxford education and a suave outlook were qualities that could not be discounted. Like nectar to butterflies, so was Ikemba to women who knew what they wanted.

In his interaction with women and romantic epistles to them, he was believed to have sumptuously deployed his rich repertoire of poetry and comforting words. Those who came his way, he swept them off their feet with his flowery vibes and verve, and they fell a dime a dozen.

He was said to have displayed his absolute love for beautiful and brainy ladies. It was also said that “you never really stand a chance as a woman if the Ikemba decides that you are really going be his love interest…. You know Ikemba, he’s ladies’ man…,” Bianca, his widow, had revealed in an interview.

Ojukwu’s disposition was believed to have been informed by a notion in the military that most military officers who trained at Sandhurst Military Academy, England, were weaned on a precept that they must remember that they were only sure of ‘today’, as they may be gone tomorrow. This kind of orientation in the army, especially among the top military echelon, is believed to encourage them to seek good companies among beautiful ladies whenever they have the opportunity to relax, as ‘tomorrow may never come.’ And Ojukwu, a ladies’ man, had more than his fair share.

From Elizabeth Okoli, daughter of Nigeria’s first Post-Master General whose marriage to the Ikemba Nnewi lasted for just two years, to Njideka Onyekwelu who had earlier been married to a certain Dr. Mends, before tying the nuptial knot with Ojukwu; Victoria who he met in Cote d’Ivoire; Stella Onyeador, chief bridesmaid during Njideka’s marriage and finally to Bianca, they all saw in Ojukwu a Romeo or King of love in whom they were well pleased.

Following the revelation emanating from the reading of his controversial will, of a lovechild, Tenny Haman, The Nation tried to seek the views of some of the late Ikemba’s associates and confidants on his love life as well as the different women in his life.

Asked to offer his perspective, Colonel Joseph Achuzia, a Biafran Commander and confidant of the Biafran warlord said he would not be dragged into taking a peek at the life of his friend, who he said should be allowed to rest in peace.

His words: The person who you are referring to was my personal and dear friend. Today, many people who did not know him are all out to caricature him. Not even his children understand him.

“It will be wrong for me to join the fray in caricaturing him or saying anything uncomplimentary about him until we understand the forces manipulating what is going on. That is why I cannot answer your question.

“Whether it is about his love life or lovechild, it all boils down to the same thing. I know everything about the man you are asking about. I know the women he married and those he did not marry.

“We as a soldiers who were involved in the war, we know all the girls who came either as friends or something else. It is an intimate knowledge which I am not ready to share or talk about. I would not like a situation where I am gone tomorrow only for me to be dissected for what people will describe as my amorous life.”

Offering an insight into the women in Ojukwu’s life, first cousin to the Biafran warlord, Chief Anthony Nnadozie Udemefuna Ojukwu, 73, while admitting that their family is known for polygamy, had hinted that there was always something different each of his wives wanted in him: “Look at Bianca; what she wanted in a man might be very different from what Njideka or Stella wanted. But what I want to assure you is that these four women were alike. They were all beautiful women.

“Emeka loved beautiful things and beautiful cars. He was a man of courage and was handsome, which was an irresistible combination. Ojukwu married four wives in all, but he was married to each of them one at a time. He married early. You know he was a young, rich and handsome man, with a lot of prospects.”

The many wives of Ojukwu:

In what would mark Ojukwu’s metamorphosis from boy to man was his marriage to his first wife Elizabeth Okoli from ‘Nnukwu Awka’, Anambra State in 1956. Elizabeth was a senior nursing sister by profession and daughter of Nigeria’s first Post-Master General. He was said to have wedded her in court. The marriage, however, suffered a setback, leading to the couple going their separate ways in 1958.

Njideka

Among the late Ikemba’s numerous wives who he married after each separation or divorce was Njideka Onyekwelu, his second wife. They were married in 1964. Njideka had earlier been married to one Dr. Mends, with whom she had a set of twins, a boy and a girl, before they separated.

According to an insider account, Njideka and Ojukwu were said to have met through their fathers who were friends and business partners. After their first encounter, they met again three years later at a tube station in London. A relationship ensued soon afterwards and was subsequently cemented through marriage, which produced three children, two of whom were named Emeka (Jnr) and Okigbo.

Describing the kind of husband the late Ojukwu was, Njideka had said: “He is just a very kind man, very polite, not intrusive. He cared less about what happens in the kitchen; he just settles for whatever you offered him. He respected me and my opinion a lot. Later, when the children got across to him, he would ask them what my opinion was on issues and I loved him immensely in return.”

Njideka and Ojukwu, according to a source, had what was called ordinance wedding then and the reception was in the family house, Eastern House in Lagos. Ojukwu married Njideka when he was the 5th Battalion Commander and they stayed on till he was appointed the governor of Eastern Region. The marriage reportedly ended in separation in Cote d’Ivoire when Ojukwu decided to take a second wife. Njideka was alleged to have left him angrily.

Victoria

A ‘hot commodity’ he turned out to be. Just as one woman was walking out of his life, another was making her way into his life, as if to fulfill the scriptural provision that ‘it is not good for a man to be alone’.

Ojukwu’s taste for ravishing beauties was never in doubt. But it was during his exile in Cote d’Ivoire that it assumed a new height. That was where Victoria stepped in to keep the Ikemba’s marital life aglow.

Ojukwu reportedly met Victoria in Cote d’Ivoire. They remained married till the early 80′s when Ojukwu was granted a state pardon by the then Nigeria’s president, Alhaji Usman Shagari.

Stella Onyeador

As the affair with Victoria began to grow cold, the Eze Nd’Igbo Gburugburu had a replacement waiting in the wings in beautiful Stella Onyeador, sister of society impresario, late Angela Onyeador. According to reports, Ojukwu and Onyeador nestled together for about 10 years without an offspring to show for it.

The two lovebirds, it was gathered, later had a spat and went to court over custody of a girl-child they adopted while in Cote d’Ivoire. Ojukwu eventually won the custody brawl as the court ruled that under French law, a woman is not eligible to adopt babies, which was the norm in Cote d’Ivoire then.

Welcome Bianca

Each time the curtain was about to be drawn on a dying relationship, there was another lurking in the corner. With the death knell finally sounded on the 10-year-old romance with Stella, ravishing and delectable Bianca stepped in.

The story of how the Ojukwu met Bianca is well documented. The story goes that for the love Ojukwu felt for Bianca, he became a sonneteer, writing sweet feelings with pencil and painting same with crayons to send to her. This was in spite of the wide gap in their ages. But age posed no blockade for his love for Bianca.

Ojukwu was said to have been one of the high dignitaries at the Silverbird beauty pageant where Bianca was crowned. He came prepared. According to a source, he wrote a love note to her with a flower inside.

Ojukwu reportedly defied all the camp rules for Bianca. According to the rule, no man courts a queen, and no queen dates a man while reigning. But both of them fell for each other. Bianca refused to let go of Ojukwu and sacrificed her Most Beautful Girl in Nigeria. She also went against her father because of Ojukwu.

But Bianca was not alone in offering Ojukwu her queenly love. She was in fierce competition with other ladies who desired his attention. There was the late Governor Sam Mbakwe’s daughter, one Barrister Onwuelo’s daughter from Nnewi and another beautiful lady.

Ojukwu’s marriage to Bianca was arguably the most celebrated celebrity marriage in Nigeria till date. Their controversial romance was a national talking point in the early 90s and reports had suggested that she was dethroned after her romance was exposed.

Bianca had spoken of their relationship thus: “We have been into a relationship since 1989 but we got married formally on November 12, 1994. We have been together for over 20 years, because we had been living together since 1989. I was 22 and he was in his mid-50s when we started. It was not your conventional relationship.

“Looking back now, I certainly realise that I was very young at that time, but it didn’t seem to matter, because we had so much in common and we had good communication. The gap was not there in our day-to-day interactions.

“People thought the relationship was bizarre because of the age difference but it’s only when I look back now that I have children of my own that I realised that it was rather unusual.

“I don’t know whether I would classify it as being in love. I just knew that the difference tended to melt away when compared to the common grounds that we had. We had a similar background and we had so much to talk about. We had common interests and we just did a lot of things together. We went to see plays at the theatre. We went on vacations and there was just no disparity in our interaction.”

What the late Ikemba loved, he held so dear. He loved his women and cared for them. While he allowed other women to walk out of his life, his love for Bianca was so uncommon that even in death, he is not ready to let go. Little wonder he caused to be inserted in his will a clause that would keep Bianca bonded to him until they reunite in heaven. Indeed, the